Past Tense

I told a friend I moved this week;
from the east to the west.
Yes, not a moment too soon as another hurricane rolled into South Florida this past week. Well, I kicked up my heels and laid down in my new soft bed (with really cool pillows - yes David the same ones!). So this weekend I...

rode my bike in the cool morning sun light.
ate sushi at my favorite restaurant on Queen Anne (Ototo).
met up with my buddy Robert at the BAC (gym) and we laughed about silly stuff.
had dinner with Ilan and Jody in Kirkland (they made awesome tapas).
sat on my porch and read the Tao of Pooh (thanks Rick).
walked to Whole Foods, got a salad and ate it (with Suze).
gave some cash to Lawrence (homeless guy who mows my lawn)
fixed Lawrence pancakes.

Yes, its good to be home...at least for a little while as I'll travel to Tucson tomorrow (my other home). It's still warm there...I think it hit 104 today (but its a dry heat)

Deal Breakers

As I rode my bike to Key Biscayne this morning...I thought about all the men I've met in Miami; the curious bunch. In meeting Miami guys, I have discovered immediate deal breakers. Top ten are as follows (no particular order - and I kid you not, these are for real):

1. He is taking up Kung Fu for anger management;
2. He sees generocity as sharing the remote during commercials;
3. He thinks flashing your breasts at VIP lounges is normal for access;
4. He likes Miami because of the scenery (women);
5. He goes for quanity over quality every time;
6. He hates "gold diggin'" women - yet wants to spoiled a women;
7. He wears a lot (I mean a lot) of jewlrey;
8. He talks with the tongue frequently scanning or touching his lips;
9. He can't complete sentences or ends them with "how ya doin'!"
10. He has more hair on his back than his head.

Living Alone

A significant bummer if you live alone is that if/when you decide to go for a walk on the beach during mid-day, and you self apply 45 SPF complete with UVA and UVB protection to your back..., you ALWAYS miss spots. OUCH! I kinda missed a big spot...and I'm suffering this evening.

I'm reminded...

I realized this weekend that I have a loyal following of my blog site.
I forgot that some really wonderful people I work with here in the sunshine state are some of these loyalist. So let me qualify my departure (because I'm eating a little crow right now).

I have met some real gems in Miami. Its almost as if they don't belong here; They are honest, decent, loving people who have helped me keep my sanity. Yes, I haven't talked much of them in this blog...but I will miss seeing them each day; and they have taught me much.

Also, a little memorial to the sales staff who worked so hard on the project AND mysteriously, quickly, swiftly were removed (I'm sure there is a story there). Well, okay two of them were removed...but as of today, all 4 of them are gone! My memorial follows:

May they rest in peace or in piece...whatever! They are as follows: In loving memory...#1) I have a BIG sexy picture of myself on my desk AMY, #2) I'm a regular Botox'er Lisa, #3) I only date hockey players and baseball team owners IRIS, and finally #4) I only date those iris wont PAUL.

Last Weekend

I approach my last weekend of "officially" living in Miami.
I could say its bittersweet, but it is just sweet.
I could say a lot of things...but I'm just thanking GOD!

Glance

Just about every day I'm driving around South Beach, some guy comes gliding up along side of me in some red or bright yellow spendy automobile that if purchased would set you back six figures and often times $250K like the newer Ferraris. You can see them approaching from a mile away. Well, as soon as they pull up to the line just to your left they continue gazing over at your car...waiting, wanting, wishing you'd see them in their fine machine; they sit...impatiently...waiting, wishing, so wanting you to see it was them driving that car. It's at this moment I turn away and offer my gaze to the right where there is a 1982 Toyota Tercel driven by a couple of Cubanos on their way to work. Smiling, they smile back...light turns green...I'm out of the block...and off to the next signal where I'm sure another bling, bling vehicle awaits per chance, my glance.

Patagooch

So I went on a little shopping spree today - say $$. Nothing what a common housewife in Miami would do in a day - say $$$$$$. However, I did purchased clothing - lots of it. Well, not any clothing, but outdoor specific women clothing. The kind of stuff that fits and provides for comfort in every aspect of life; not the stuff that lifts you or point body parts or needs to be pulled down with every step. This shit fits.

I realized I was starved for the stuff because Miami does not know brands such as:

• Patgonia (Patagucci - as those of us loyalist term this clothier for its expense);
• Sierra Designs
• North Face
• Isis

We (Seattle) also have some pretty ugly looking shoes here, but damn are they functional!

Montreal vs. Miami

I've been in Montreal since Monday. The trip is a business trip, and its been a trip...a nice one to give more perspective on Miami and life in general.

In Montreal, they speak French; In Miami,...well Spanglish;

Montreal, they use the Canadian dollar for currency; Miami, one uses any currency available (cash, gold, food, certain acts - you get the picture);

Montreal, restaurant staff is welcoming and cordial; Miami, is there wait staff? (certainly you pay for them - 15-18% tip is automatically added to every bill);

In Montreal, I'm loved as they say "ah....peeeeeecarhhhhhh," (as Picard is a loved French name and it took me a while before I knew they were talking to me);
In Miami, I'm a dot on the highway actually a small one as you must show skin, clevage, and walk with a manufactured bounce and swag to further attract any wandering eyes.

So I depart late this afternoon to Tucson via Chicago; logging the miles.

Hurricane Parties

Having dinner with a Miami acquantance this past Sunday I learned about Hurricane Parties.
These are big events that happen in the South Florida party scene. Basically the parties happen when there is at least a Cat 4 or 5 cane headed your way. Given the new building codes since Hurricane Andrew, all new residential towers must have glass that holds a 160 mph rating - and if you are so fortunate to own or rent such a space that is above the swell or surf surge line (say 17 feet above tide, or above the 4th floor) you have a great party venue.

Now...when all the authorities give an evacuation order, this is the sign to call the party! Folks gather in your venue bringing the highest proof beverage from those liquor stores staying open until the flood water's approach (its probably the highest revenue season). Now in more recent times the authorities have tried to cut down on the insanity by shutting down power and forcing evacuations. This has done nothing but make the parties bigger.

There is something very, very wrong here.

Flattery Gets You Everywhere...

I've discovered the greatest compliment one can give to another when meeting someone for the first time in Miami...

"Hey, where are YOU from?"

Which is to say...you are not from around here. I often get this very question when I'm nice to a sales person, hold the door for another, be the last to enter the elevator, wait my turn in line, smile, OR walk with sheer joy and bliss in my step. Its fun to mess with these people (new yorkers with a tan)!

Skin Deep

Okay...I'm going to make a gross generalization here...but people who are objective about their surroundings will understand my statements to follow.

Miami culture is founded on the endless pursuit of wealth and beauty; Its a vicious circle really, running in fear of losing either one or both. Women seek youthful appearance to secure those guys that are the most fiscally fit. Why do the women need cash? Well, keeping an youthful appearance is not inexpensive. Here are common (everyday) procedures that are done and their average prices:

Arm Lift (Brachioplasty) $5000-6500

Blue Peel $500-700

Botox $200-400 per area (repeat 6 mos)

Breast Augmentation (saline) $5000-6500

Breast Augmentation(silicone) $6000-8000

Breast Lift $5000-6000

Chin or Cheek Implants $3000-4500

Collagen Injection $500-1500

Deep Chemical Peel $3500-5000

Dermabrasion $2000-4000

Eyelid Tuck (upper & lower) $4000-5500

Face Lift $7000-9000

Forehead Lift (Brow Lift) $3500-5000

Hair Removal (Laser) $300-800

Laser (Erbium) $2500-4000

Laser (CO2) $4000-5000

Lip Augmentation $600-2000

Liposuction (1 area) $2500-4500

Liposuction (3 areas) $5500-7000

Liposuction (5 areas) $8000-10,000

Medium Peel $1500-2500

Micro Peel $60-100

Nose Surgery $5000-6000

Pectoral Implants $6000-7000

Permanent Eyeliner $300-1000

Permanent Lip Liner $300-1000

Spider Vein Rx (Laser) $400-1000

Spider Vein Rx (Sclero) $200-500

Tattoo Removal (Laser) $300-800

Tummy Tuck $6000-8000

Men know they need a beautiful woman for community status and personal ego, so they need to communicate they have cash. Guys communicate this by driving more car then they can afford, buying expensive gifts, etc. So needless to day if you are losing wealth and you are losing youth (which are inevitable)...you are nothing here in Miami. The depth of the culture is skin deep...and empty beyond the surface.

Soul Food, Food for the Soul

I love...

• Smoothie after a hot and humid miami bike ride;
• Fresh herbs in a salad with goat cheese in the early evening;
• Roasted pumpkin seeds atop fresh blackened salmon, in great company;
• Dry aged filet, medium rare w/ a velvet red wine after a hard hike;
• Oven baked sweet potato - sugars oozing out the garnet red skin - anytime;
• Pink lady apples in November;
• Green's+ food bar on a 6 hour plane ride (make it three of them);
• Seared black cod with a sweet miso glaze on a summer eve
• Braised rapini kissed with dark olive oil, dashed with salt crystals; AND
• Dark chocolate (70% cocoa) nibbled with a crisp pear to close an evening.

Another Day In Miami

Today was just another day in Miami. Actually, this must have been the first time I have ever experienced a professional attorney's office quite like the one I ventured into today. I suspect an office on Washington Blvd (in the heart of SOBE) should have been my first clue. I entered the office where a seemingly attractive woman (and well endowed - amazingly like every chick in Miami Beach) sits behind a desk offering me assistance. I said "I'm here to see Kent, I have a 3pm appointment." She says..."oooh, he's not here." She proceeds to call him...where there is so much background noise and he tells me to go ahead and relax in his office...lay on the couch he tells me, take a nap...

I should have. But I got on my computer...then a gentleman by the name of Paul walks in. Paul was tatooed from head to toe. He had a tat on his knuckles that read "HATE". He seemed a little amped up and promptly asked for Kent. The busty woman behind the desk was now managing this rather unique client and myself. Paul was restless and begin talking about jail time, jail bait and the sort. The woman managed to escort Paul to another office (feeling a little embarassed). As my cell phone rang and I responded to the call...Kent arrived and plopped himself in front of me. It was about this time that he called "shee-ba, shee-ba." Then, from the shadows of the room, an odd cat, no...a lynx slithers across the floor, jumps up on the table between Kent and I, and begins rubbing the side of its face against Kent's as Kent kisses the animal on its every pass. Hmmmm. this was a rather intimate moment and I felt a little uncomfortable being in the room.

Well it doesn't end there. Shee-ba set laid herself on the table between the two of us. Kent told me not to show teeth (i.e. smile) because that would threaten her. Well...about half way through our conversation regarding some litigation matters...the Shee-ba (who was facing Kent) turned her neck around at me and gave the biggest HISSSSSSS I've ever heard (except for maybe those tigers on National Geographic Channel). Kent told me Shee-ba was jealous. Well, I walked out of that office...thinking...just another day in Miami.

Shuffle-uf-a-gus

I love my shuffle. This little device seems most used while I cycle in the morning. My top ten songs I'm grooving to as of yesterday are:

1. Situations - Jack Johnson
2. Till Kingdom Come - Cold Play
3. Lack of Water - The Why Store
4. Pride (In the Name of Love) - U2
5. Peace Train - Cat Stevens
6. Indescribable - Chris Tomlin
7. American Baby - Dave Mathews
8. His Latest Flame - Mary Lou Lord
9. Not Even Close - Tim Finn
10. Road to Nowhere - Talking Heads

Riding around Lake Washington - Seattle, WA - 7/30/05 - 6am

Joy

Matt is one of my dearest and most important friends in the world. We were in the trenches together at MIT (the rough years for both of us). He is a type A, investment banker, son of two Jewish doctors that married a Harvard Divinity School grad, Unitarian Minister, farmer's son from Seattle. The two of them adopted this sweet little african american baby rescued from a drug abusing mother. They are certainly not your typical family but they have some of the most amazing and rock solid family values I have seen from any family unit.

We all had breakfast near Pikes Place Market in Seattle this past Sunday. Being with them brought me great joy...especially when Cory laughed everytime you pulled out the camera to take his picture; pure joy.